A Colourful visit from Ryan Loveless!


I’m back! The third time must be a charm because I can think of nothing more charming than to be at Victoria Blisse’s blog once more. Today I want to talk about changing prejudices, which is a theme in my new release Kaden’s Colors. In Kaden’s Colors, many people rethink their negative opinions of aliens and realize they are wrong.

I was pleased to be able to present this scenario because I’ve lived it. When I was nineteen and closeted, someone close to me had suspicions. She sat me down and said she didn’t know what she’d do if I was gay. Then she asked me flat out if I was. No surprise, I denied it.

Fast forward almost fifteen years later, and while it’s still a little awkward to talk about my specific situation with her, she’s now a proponent of gay marriage and even told me that she thinks God made someone for everyone, and she asked me to point out gay couples to her so she could see God at work. I thought that was a beautiful thing, and I was glad she was using her faith to support her acceptance. I think the simplicity of that idea makes it all the better.

Everyone has difficulties in their lives, and often those difficulties are caused or exacerbated by the reaction of other people. I wrote Kaden’s Colors partly because I wanted to tell a story of people changing. It’s not a perfect book by far, but it’s a special one to me. I hope that if you read it, it will become special to you as well.


The first alien immigrants arrived on Earth long before Henry Mekes was born. Now they’re policed by the government, forbidden from attending school, and assigned menial jobs to prevent them from becoming drains on human society. Twenty-two-year-old Kaden, for example, was assigned the job of sex worker.

When eighteen-year-old Henry and his friend Ellil meet Kaden in a grotty backroom to avail themselves of his services, alien rights are the furthest thing from their minds. It’s not until afterward, when Henry is trying to remind himself aliens can’t get enough of sex, that he questions his actions and the rules of the world he lives in.

Something about Kaden compels Henry to return again and again—but only as a friend. Soon he and his classmates hatch a plan to free Kaden, but even if they succeed, the world is still full of prejudice against aliens—and those who love them.



HENRY stuffed his biology homework into his messenger bag. Another bright F to hide from his parents. Headmaster Dowe had called him into his office three times in the past three months to talk about his dropping GPA. Henry had told him there was trouble at home, which was a massive lie. His parents still acted like they were on their honeymoon after twenty years of marriage, and they doted on Henry. But it was easier and safer to say “Things are difficult at home” than the truth.

The truth was that he was out until three every night sitting beside an alien object of curiosity, that he watched this alien as men thrust into it in the back room of a seedy arcade. He sat with his back against the wall and his knees pulled up to his chest, and the alien watched him back. He knew that it wasn’t really watching, not with sentient awareness like a person would. It just happened to orient its head in Henry’s direction when it heard Henry’s pen scratching in his notebook as he pretended to study. It almost never looked away, though, not while it was being fucked, which it was, constantly, by a stream of men who seemed to think that Henry was a sort of guard.

It had started because Ellil wanted another go. Claiming that Henry’s “stupid dreamy face” was making him jealous, Ellil went back to MacDougal’s alone. Henry wanted to let Ellil have his fun, but he couldn’t concentrate on anything as he thought of Ellil with the alien. Henry went back after that. But he didn’t touch the alien. He couldn’t think about how he’d touched it that first night without confusing himself with memories of desire and repulsion. He couldn’t shake the feeling that he’d raped it or the memory of how pleasurable the alien’s mouth had felt around his cock. He watched the other men, probably glaring sometimes when they got too rough. He started feeling protective. Maybe it was his version of the apology he couldn’t voice.

Aside from the first time when he had almost unconsciously fucked its mouth, Henry had just watched. He didn’t want to get stupid with the drugged effect again. The satisfaction he got now came from being near it, from being watched by it. The alien made Henry feel like he mattered. It was a difficult thing to explain. He knew he shouldn’t be getting his worth from something that had no feelings; he didn’t even know if its eyesight was strong enough to see him the few feet away where he sat. He felt a connection, though, and it kept him coming back. The first few times he sat for an hour alone. The fourth time, Madsen, the man outside the curtain taking tickets, came in and caught him sitting. After that, he started letting others go in, too, but still took enough tickets from Henry to cover all his hours, so he made double profit. Henry didn’t know what Madsen told them, but they ignored him and went about their business. Madsen gave Henry one treasure, though: the alien’s name.


Watching Kaden get fucked was fascinating. Its eyes dilated, and Henry could tell that it was trying to spread its legs wider, even though they were tied open. Some of the men spanked Kaden as they drove into it—hard, stinging slaps—and this set Kaden’s breath stuttering too. Despite his guilt, Henry palmed himself through the khaki pants of his school uniform, almost erupting when he saw Kaden’s tongue drift out of its full lips. Only the punter calling out that Henry should join in snapped Henry back to reality, and he blushed red as he moved his hand back to his knee, even though he wanted to slide his fingers into Kaden’s mouth. The fact that he was in a room with a stranger stopped him. He couldn’t do something so intimate in front of someone he didn’t know.

There was a bit of mesh fencing that had been burrowed under and hidden by a shrub in the back of the school grounds, and this was how Henry let himself back onto campus in the minutes before dawn. Then he had a few hours of sleep until he had to be up for class.

Ellil had had the idea that Henry should take his homework. Ellil had accompanied him a few times since Henry started keeping watch, “to take the edge off,” he’d said, but then he’d started dating a girl from the junior class and lost interest in going.

It took some practice to do his homework and watch Kaden at the same time, but he got the hang of it. Some of the regulars even greeted him now, but he put his head down and focused on conjugating his Latin verbs. All kinds of men came in to fuck Kaden. Some were business men who paid with cash, some college kids who played games like Henry did until they earned enough tickets to see the alien, some were men that Henry would cross the street to avoid if he saw them outside, and who proved his fear legitimate in the way they treated Kaden. Some men Madsen made him clear out for, politicians mostly, until Henry became as much a part of the room as Kaden and they stopped telling Madsen to make him leave.

He was in the middle of his Latin homework when he heard a harsh, rasping sound. It took his brain a moment to parse it into speech and then to get decipherable words out of it.

“Help me.”

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Bio: First published in 2010, Ryan Loveless is the author of several novellas and novels, all m/m except one: Building Arcadia (Blueprints Not Included), winner of three 2011 Rainbow Book Awards, including Best Debut Transgender/Bisexual novel. Her work can be found at Dreamspinner Press, Silver Publishing, Smashwords, or all in one place at the Amazon of your preference.