#Eroticon2013 Love, laughter and sexiness.

So I want to fit in everything that happened the past weekend, I want to mention everyone I met but it’s just not going to happen. I’m going to share some of what happened and some of what I thought and lots of what I felt. This won’t be my last eroticon blog post, expect more in the coming days/weeks with input from my smutastic friends.

Talking of which, that’s a good place to start. The Northern Birds flew south for the good smut stuff and met at St Pancras station. From there we waved through the tunnels of the London underground and bumped into all our other smutty friends in a lift at the hotel.

We were a moisture of smutters (that is the official collective noun for it, we decided) that included the lovely, lilting, cheeky smiling Tabitha Rayne, Kay Jaybee, the mistress of pain & limericks, KD Grace one of the nicest and smutiest people I know, the stylish and ever so sweet Lexie Bay and the luscious, lovely and really funny Lily Harlem. Add in the Bouncy bit of Blisse and the fantastic Felthouse northern birds and the moistness is complete. Hmm, maybe I need to rephrase that…nah, never mind.

The first evening we had a rollicking good time at Volupte with the Kitten Club includig the delectable, the most awesome Dave the Bear there was some serious fangirling going on round our table, once you’ve experienced the Big Hairy Growler, ain’t nothing else that will satisfy, I can tell you.

It was the most perfect start to the Eroticon weekend, good food, good friends, sexy ladies and gents pulling off clothes and making us laugh. Absolute bliss for the Blisse.

One thing I found out over the weekend, I apparently get better vocab when I’ve not slept. I came up with some huge words at weird hours of the day and night and sleep was a very brief visitor in the mix.

I am very eager to tell you all about Kristina Lloyd‘s Sex Machine. Her’s was the first craft session I attended and by that I mean word craft. All glue and glitter was in word form. I went in looking for threads of woo and ended up with so much more. We filled in a sheet of brightly coloured boxes, our sex machine and we all had such fun doing it. We were abuzz with imagination and desire. This is what I’ve pulled from my sex machine today:

Big hair, streaked with the light behind rapidly closed eyelids bounces as he thrusts rawly and roarly into me. I look at him but look through him, seeing everything and nothing all at once. I am his, pridefully taken, willingly used. His eyes flash open, warm heat hits me like hot savannah air and I flush with danger and excitement. I’m in the predator’s line of vision, he has spotted me, marked me as his to devour. I do not hide, I cannot run I am frozen, pinned beneath him. All I can do is wait and plead silently for mercy that I’m not sure I really want. Everything within me is exposed as he presses down a sapphire kiss. Prickly whiskers stab, stab, stab and tiny flecks of golden pain ignite my skin, warm, wet lips pull forth moisture from top to toe. He rips and tears in eager abandon and I surrender, unable to do more, not needing to or wanting to.

Taken, I surrender to the cloud of candyfloss comfort that breaks through the raging lust and arrogant ecstasy. His chocolate rubs my vanilla and we blend in soft and feathery giddiness and I laugh as he finishes me, sequins bursting firework-like from my soul, a sacrifice. He rolls away, sated. I am used, the carcass, watching the vultures of left over desire soaring against the diamond flecked sun and I know it is not over. There is more to be torn from my flesh, I am not done yet.

Anyone pick out what my Character’s animal was? Kristina’s session was exactly what I needed. I’ve written A LOT of late and was experiencing the authorly niggle of ‘is this all too samey?’ and Boom, now I have a sex machine and a new way to approach things and inspiration for when I’m stuck, yay!

The other session I attended on the Saturday was Remittance Girl’s Eroticism and Romanticism which was filled with so much to think about, so many talking points, so much fear and potential and excitement. A great mix and I got a huge amount from it. She’s got all the power point stuff (extended I believe) on her site, it is well worth checking out. I think Remittance Girl is fab. I love the way her mind works!

After a big lunch and much chatting, catching up with the wonderful Hazel Cushion of Xcite books for example, we had lots of fun with a marvelous man named Mario. He runs a site called SomeoneOnceToldMe and was looking for willing victims to join in with this fabulous project.

What we girlies did was think of something significant we were once told, wrote it down on a big piece of paper and were photographed holding it up. Mario had me on the stairs *cough* and Lexie outside *cough cough*, it was all good fun. We then told him the story which he recorded and one day we’ll be up on his site and you’ll be able to see what someone once told us.

Then Lucy Felthouse had an idea and Lexie, Tabitha, Lily, and us Northern birds fluttered off to visit the Sh! Girlz in Hoxton. I may I have bought myself a present, we definitely all had a fabulous time and were treated like royalty. If you’re a lady and you want to buy something sexy in an encouraging environment then head to SH! Hoxton and lap up the loveliness. Just don’t suck on the products, they frown on that kind of behaviour you know.

I will be taking my paddle to Smut by the Sea to use on recalcitrant Authors.

We then went on a hell bent, alcohol fueled destructive tour of London Bridge…or maybe we went to the Gourmet Burger Kitchen then onto the hotel bar and just talked and talked and talked and talked. You decide.

Sunday was Anthologies Panel day. Lucy and I were smutting and Rachel Krammer Bussel and Maxim Jakubowski represented themselves. We had a fun time, were asked great questions and if you want to know all the pertinent information check out Remittance Girl’s blog of Sunday stuff. She lists all you need to know.

I met so many brill people over the weekend and lots of talking was done but especially so on the Sunday because my brain was mostly mush. I did make it to KD Grace’s session on Finessing sex though, because she’s KD and I knew it would be brilliant. It surely was. We got to write, yay! And this is the little bit of a scene I managed to write (taken from the centre of the action) in ten minutes.

“Fucking Hell, you’re hot.” I turned to kiss the spot on his neck just below the ear, He smelt of heat, oak and aniseed.

“You’re not too bad yourself, love.” He replied grasping my naked breast and squeezing it, testing its boundaries and drawing in to pluck my hard nipple.

“Why thank you kind sir,” I mocked, nipping at his earlobe with my teeth and resting my hand on his hip. I felt the throb, throb, throb of the club next door. It was as insistent as the cock pressing against my thigh. I forgot for a moment how much trouble I was in, I forgot for a moment who I was, who owned me, who named me his and gave myself over to something new. Something fun, something ecstatic. Joyous, flippant sex.

My skin as liquid as if it had taken on the qualities of it’s colour, pale as milk. I flowed into him, onto him and mixed with the treacled perfection that was his naked body beside mine. Cupped as we were we could have gone either way but I wanted to be on top.

Micky never let me do that but Steve would, I knew it. He fell back with my gentle push, he needed no persuasion and I scrambled, eager to have him in me, to feel complete. I wanted it more than anything and that fucking scared me.

I can’t possibly write about everything, sadly but I have given you a flavour. I hope to be bringing you more, eroticon fun over the next few weeks, so keep an eye out. It was a wonderful weekend filled with love, laughter and sexiness. Thank you Ruby Kiddell for organising everything, you’re a star

Victoria Blisse

Victoria Blisse is known as the Queen of Smut, Reverend to the kinky and is the Writer in Residence at Cocktails and Fuck Tales. She’s also an angel. Ask anyone. Mancunian Odd Duck, her northern English quirkiness shows through in all of her stories along with her own particular brand of humour and romance that bring laughs and warm fuzzies in equal measure. Passion, love and laughter fill her works, just as they fill her busy life.

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  • I’m just so envious of your girls’ evening out, damn it! And I so agree with you about Kristina’s Sex Machine exercise. I need to kick my but and put some of the product of that down onto the keyboard.

    It was an exhilarating weekend, and such a pleasure to meet you again!

    • It was a damn good evening out, I can’t deny that! I had great fun playing with my sex machine to get a little piece of writing out. I want to extend it and play with it some more now!

      It was lovely seeing you too, hopefully it won’t be long ’til our paths cross again!

  • I agree with Lily! How did you get all this done woman? I’m still looking for a place to snuggle up in! Such a wonderful time x x Thank you

    • I was inspired, Tabitha, that is all I can say. And I’m a good girl…why does no one believe me when I say that? ;)

  • Fabulous post, Sweetie! And such a good time it was! Every post I read brings it all back and it’s like doing it over again! Such a great time! I can hardly wait for Smut by the Sea! Kxx

  • You are such a teacher’s pet to have done your homework for Kristina :-) I love it though, I’m sure you’ll get A*

    It was an amazing weekend, but it was ‘the gang’ being together that really made it special.


  • Haha, as usual you’ve made me laugh out loud, both with recollections of the crazy stuff we got up to, and your comment about “A Big Hairy Growler.” It was truly awesome, and I’m looking forward to Smut by the Sea very much :)

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