I don’t have a penis. This isn’t really a confession that will surprise any of you but it definitely meant I needed a little hand testing out the Hot Octopuss Jett sent to me to review by the awesome Hot Octopuss team.

Labelled as a revolutionary guybrator which isn’t  the most inclusive of names I have to say. What about a gals with dicks and non binary beauties? To give Hot Octopuss their due, though, you can choose to remove gendered language from their website when you  visit which isn’t perfect but it’s certainly a good step.

The Jett looks like no other sex toy I’ve ever seen. Both myself and my husband (the penis owner who offered to help me out with this particular review) were intrigued by the set up. It looks like a jet pack for your dick which I suppose is where the name comes from.

2 huge barrel bullet vibrators are housed in a stretchy silicon sheath that has a loop to secure it to the penis. This then has wires that connect it to a handset. Which has separate controls for each bullet. One is the treble that ‘emits powerful high-frequency waves’ and the other is the bass which delivers ‘deep rumbly vibrations’

I love how you can control the bullets separately so you can find the right pitch for you. Clever. There’s various power settings and a few different patterns to try. Fun times trying them all out and finding your favourites!

Being seriously smutty people, we tested the Jett together and alone. You know, to be thorough. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work for my Kev.  He can’t position it in a way that doesn’t just irritate him. No matter how we alter the treble and bass, he doesn’t like the vibrations.  He doesn’t like the bullets nestled on his balls or twister around to the side or on top of his cock.

We suspect this is because he has a super sensitive cock. I mean, super sensitive and the direct vibration feels a bit too aggressive for his liking.

The vibrations are great though. I mean, I use a doxy, I like my power and the Jett certainly has power in spades. It is controllable power too, so you can adjust it to exactly what you like. Fantastic.

We gave the Jett away as a prize in one of our smut market erotic tombolas and a friend of ours won it. He can’t stop singing it’s praises. Pretty much instant orgasm, he says. He loves it. Loves the power and the throb. So, as with all sex toys, it depends on your junk and what your junk enjoys.

If you love power, if you like the idea of a hands free orgasm (all you gotta do is place the Jett on and then it’s all down to using the controller) then you’re probably going to be thrilled to bits with the Jett.

It’s battery powered, which means you can’t forget to charge it, when you want to use it, you just need batteries. But on the other side of that, you need to have batteries (4 AA) so you might be doing a scrabble to find all the remotes and batterY driven clocks in your home to be able to use it!

Slick, sleek, comfortable and innovative, the Jett is completely unique in the world of sex toys for penises and if you want to try something new, something musically powerful and something hands free give it a go.