5th March 2015 - Genesis of a Dom - 23 Comments

Genesis of a Dominant Man – Non-Disclosure



I’m sure you’re all as thrilled as me to know that V is Back, yay!  I think that’s all the introduction he needs, lets face it, none of you want to be reading my words right now. Okay V, it’s over to you:




All the below acts are completely consensual. In every Dom/sub experience I’ve had we’ve agreed safe words and signals for both sides.


Mutual respect and trust are key elements of any good arrangement. So why is it that today on my day in college one of sub 3’s best friends has just approached me asking about the fetish things I do. A brief conversation reveals that 3 has broken the part of our agreement stating non-disclosure. Now her friend wants a similar arrangement, my mind is a playground with how I could punish 3 before I terminate our arrangement. But a betrayal on this scale requires a reaction of equal measure.

This young lady who has approached me maybe of use for this after all, I take her number and promise to message her later. She turns and runs back to her friend, red hair flowing behind, I must admit this will be enjoyable.

Messaging 3, I arrange to have a session with her this Saturday informing her that a particular clause around the inclusion of another person in our arrangement could be invoked. Messaging her friend I say to meet me for coffee and a discussion on the Friday before. Coffee with the friend goes well, we discuss a range of things before creating a contract. The arrangement however will only begin after a proving of her character and commitment

On Saturday Sub 3 arrives on time for our session.  She is always punctual. She is dressed in pleasing attire but it isn’t long before she is tied up and blindfolded. I set about my work.  I glance at my phone quickly when I receive a message saying that part of the punishment has arrived.

I grab a flogger from my desk and start to flog 3 on her ass, her tits and her thighs. Once I view that enough is enough I flip her onto her back and slide a vibrator deep inside whilst I lick her now wet quivering clit. Her moans gain momentum and I can see the climax forming within her at which point I stop and instruct her to keep the vibrator inside whilst I go fetch something.

I re-enter but this time I’m not alone. Gently I tie back her red hair, gently guide her to the bed and motion for her to start devouring the quivering pussy of her friend. 3’s moans grow again and I instruct her that she may not cum ‘til I say whilst I play with the red head’s tight holes. She is barely containing herself, the pleasure unbearable to resist. I smile.

“This is your punishment for betraying my trust.”  As I say the words, “sub you may cum now.” I remove the blindfold. She screams with pleasure, a look of shock on her face as she sees her best friend eating her out and giving her such an intense orgasm.

She looks at me now knowing straight away that I know she spoke of the arrangement.

“Our arrangement is over, it has been a pleasure and I wish you well.”

Then I reward her friend kissing her fully and groping her body, I push her forward into doggy position and fuck her hard not stopping until we both have climaxed in front of my now ex sub. Untying her she dresses and I walk her to the door.

“I’m sorry I betrayed your trust and our arrangement.”

“Not as sorry as I am that it must end but this is why the contract exists.”

One simple rule with me, if the contract we both agreed in mutual trust and respect is broken then it is over.

The down side: I lost a sub I had come to regard as amazing in a lot of ways. Plus side: it turns out her friend, my sub 4 is so much more kinkier in all the right ways.




23 responses to “Genesis of a Dominant Man – Non-Disclosure”

  1. mskind81 says:

    Sorry she betrayed your trust, but glad it worked out in the end! Thank you for sharing!

  2. Phaedra says:

    Thank you for sharing

  3. Karen Shenton says:

    Very interesting post. I can see why your relationships require complete trust. It was an unfortunate slip up but it was a breach of that trust. I’m glad that the outcome wasn’t all bad for those concerned.

  4. Ali Greig says:

    Love your diary entries. Sorry you were betrayed but its her loss. She knew she had done wrong.

  5. Remittance Girl says:

    I’d like to thank you for this. It inspired the most delicious violent fantasies of slitting your scrotal sac open, pulling out your testes and forcing them down your throat. Delicious, thanks! Every so often, my sadistic side peeks out.

  6. Molly says:

    I have considered this piece long and hard and debating whether leaving a comment is a good idea but have decided that I feel so strongly about it that I am compelled to. I am deeply bothered by this piece being presented as a positive description of D/s as what I read here is not consensual but abusive.

    You state at the beginning that “All the below acts are completely consensual. In every Dom/sub experience I’ve had we’ve agreed safe words and signals for both sides.” but the moment you have decided to terminate that relationship then you no longer have the right to act within the confines of this agreement as it was agreed upon by that person on the understanding that they are involved in a relationship with you when in fact in your mind the relationship was over. If they have done something to break that contract in your mind then the contract is broken and therefore NO LONGER stands. You can not continue to assume their consent when the very foundation they based it on no longer exists in your mind.

    Punishment is only punishment within the confines of the relationship, if the relationship is over then your ‘right’ to punish someone is also over. You get ‘her friend’ to conspire with you in an elaborate scene, the whole purpose of which is dump that person and take up with the other person. That is not punishment, there is no ongoing learning or even relationship, if anything it feels like revenge sex to me. That is not being a Dominant but being an arsehole.

    “But a betrayal on this scale requires a reaction of equal measure.” Being dominant is not about revenge. Being a Dom is about education, mutual pleasure, teaching, encouraging, nurturing someone to be the best person and sub someone can be. This is not about any of that, this is about rejection. if your trust has been so deeply violated that the relationship is broken then continuing to act as if it has not so your can ‘punish’ that person before dumping them is so NOT OK.

    If this piece had been presented as a work of fiction then none of this applies, fiction is, after all, fiction, but to present it as a real life diary implying this is some sort of role model or acceptable way to behave as a Dom is deeply disturbing to me.

    There are so many reg flags here; you acquire and dispose of ‘subs’ with great ease, you don’t seem to have any thought for how this scene may effect either of the women involved. You appear to be quite happy to play one woman off against the other. You admit the contract is broken but continue to ‘use it’ for your own ends.

    As far as I am concerned there is only one acceptable way to end a relationship with someone and that is to sit and down and tell them, fucking their friend in front of them, no matter what ‘contract’ or agreement you had with that person beforehand is simply not OK.


    • You have put your finger on every single thing I felt was wrong with this and brought out the rampant sadist in me. I’m so glad you commented so eloquently Molly.

      Meanwhile, as a piece of fiction, there is no character development or insight into the motivations and inner world of the narrator. Honestly, American Psycho had more depth. But the sentence at the beginning makes it clear it is not meant to be read as fiction. And that, in my mind, makes it ripe for critique. This person has no idea what the core of BDSM ethos is about.

  7. Matt S says:

    When a contract is written between a sub and a dom it is a contract of trust the non-disclosure part included is plain and simple. I put it in so both parties don’t have to worry about people finding out (as at the time I’d only been a dom exploring the ins and outs of this kinky way, I wanted atleast for it to remain hidden). As I’d only been doing this two years at this point in my dom life it was a learning experience for me also, the betrayal of having something we’d agreed on so strongly at the time being thrown aside I remember really angered and actually upset me. The punishment whilst severe was actually within the arrangement of our contract as we’d agreed a third party could be involved aslong as the other consented to it which she did, keeping within the contract till the end was important to myself as whilst 3 may not have seen to value this point of trust I did.

    • Molly says:

      You seem to have missed my point. I have no issue with you involving a 3rd party in the scene if that was something she had already consented to, but consenting to involving a 3rd party within your play and consenting to that 3rd party being her ‘friend’ and used as a method to dump her are two very different things.

      Also, punishment by its nature is meant to be corrective, by its very definition it is meant to teach and improve not be used as a means to reject someone. If their actions warrant reject then punishment is no longer part of the dynamic.

      Also, the moment the contract was broken for you by her losing your trust the contract is BROKEN, you shouldn’t continue to use the contract once that trust is gone as you are now using it against her. You are no longer invested in protecting, teaching, nurturing her but are only using it to ‘teach her a lesson’. In my opinion the person who really violated someone here is you.

      The moment you feel this….
      ” the betrayal of having something we’d agreed on so strongly at the time being thrown aside I remember really angered and actually upset me”

      you can no longer be acting in everyone’s best interests instead you are being motivated by hurt and anger. It is OK to feel that way but not to let that motivate your actions within a D/s setting (or any other relationship for that matter). Hurt and anger have no place in a D/s scene, that is when you cross the line, if you are operating from a place of anger then you have lost control and have no business Domming someone in that moment. In my opinion your hurt feelings do not justify your behaviour even if she did consent to it because it is up to the Dom to know better.

      You do not seem to be able to see that the moment the relationship was over in your head, which was the moment her friend approached you, then the contract was also over and therefore anything after that was not done under the confines of the relationship.

      If you are presenting this as a… ‘I did this thing when I was learning and I got it wrong’…. then fair play but that it is not the way it is written.

      Sadly I suspect you will continue to champion your ‘rightness’ in all this citing ‘the contract’ as an excuse for your behaviour. However the contract is quite frankly a moot point, it is about behaving decently and honourably to other people and not blindly operating under the guise of a contract when clearly the relationship is at an end.

      I stand by my belief that this is a poor example of how to conduct oneself within a D/s relationship


      • Matt S says:

        Just to clear up this wasn’t a relationship the arrangement was similar to what people would call fuck buddies. Yes I’d cite the contract on this as it completely details and outlines the terms and limits of this arrangement, I’m 25 now so this was a good 6 nearly 7 years ago alot has changed since this event. The diary entries are my past exploits. As regards to the remark on how ‘quickly’ you say I go through subs, the example given in this piece is the only time I terminated our contract the rest were terminated by the subs who wanted relationships rather than arrangements. At that moment in my life I didn’t really want commitment in the relationship sense but I was still happily exploring my developing kinks and finding out what it means to be a dom.

      • Matt:
        One is stupid and narcissistic and generally self-absorbed in many ways at the age of 18. When one embarks on a piece of life-writing about it, 7 years later, there is a level of self-reflection expected. Unless, of course, one hasn’t learned anything in the interim.

        The moment you decided that your ‘confidence’ had been violated, and you no longer wanted to be with that woman, everything that took place after was outside of the context of a D/s paradigm. It’s a piece of revenge porn. It doesn’t have the imagery, the poetics or the revelations of a piece of erotic fiction. It lacks even the most minimal level of self-awareness. It’s wank fodder for bitter boys who are too immature and insecure to examine their vulnerabilities. And as a piece of non-reflective life-writing, you’ve just validated a lot of young men in need of far better ‘models’ than this.

  8. Ruby says:

    I’m unsure why this isn’t being called what it really is – revenge. Sub 3 broke the contract, and this upset you. At that point, the contract (and the relationship/fuck-buddy-arrangement) ended. Anything else that took place after that point is revenge for that pain caused on her part. It’s not a ‘punishment’ if there’s no longer a D/s relationship.

    IMO, this is a revenge story with some kink – nothing close to an authentic D/s dynamic. Knowing that you were 18/19 at the time does make sense – its a rather juvenile reaction to a breakup of sorts. But it is what it is, and I’d assume you’ve grown a bit wiser since then.

  9. Monocle says:

    Someday, perhaps it’ll take another 6, or 16 years, I hope Matt be able to will look back on both the original events and his current defense of them with more maturity and compassion. Molly is right. The moment it became about revenge, he violated his own contract as badly as his sub had. The moment he _acted_ in revenge, it was far worse. I get it. I did some really stupid stuff at 18, too. We learn, we grow – but we have to cop to it first.

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