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I was thrilled to be invited to sit on the Scarlet Ladies Body Image panel and delighted to be able to accept. London is a little bit of a distance from Manchester and I was glad that this date worked for me and I could make it along.

Positive body image is something that is very pertinent to me as an author and as a curvy woman. I really was excited to join in a conversation on the subject as I try to empower the women who read my work to be confident in the body they’ve been given. The older I get the more convinced I am of the importance of loving the skin you’re in.

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So I headed down on the train to the big smoke – left Manchester is glorious sun and hit London in the middle of a proper English downpour. I had to buy myself an umbrella! Found my way to the general vicinity of the location and sat down in a friendly pub to dry out and wait for the amazing Emma (photo above) one of the Brit Babes Street Team, good mate and moral support for the evening.

We had a drink and a chat then headed over in (thankfully) bright sunshine to the venue. We met Sarah and Jeanette, the intrepid twosome who run Scarlet Ladies and within moments I was being interviewed by the lovely Josephine for Radio Gorgeous , an unexpected delight.

The gathering was small but select, a last minute (un-avoidable) change of venue and a panel member unable to join us probably contributed to that but it certainly didn’t hold us back. My fellow panel members for the night were Sarah and Jeanette and Chloe Hamblen of Lascivious Lingerie fame.

It was a laid back affair, with lots of discussion and laughter. It was interesting to hear other people’s body image hang ups and how they deal with them. The ladies gathered had some years of experience behind them shall I say and many of us had got to the ‘fuck it’ stage of life. Where, at least we try, to say ‘fuck it’ to pleasing everyone else, to worrying about how we look and just getting on with it.

I’m there myself, or trying to be at least. I still slip back into old insecurities sometimes but I’m much more confident in myself now than I once was. I enjoyed discussing body image with a variety of ladies who all held different opinions or had slightly different points of view. We all agreed a lot of our body insecurities stemmed from childhood. What unfortunately we didn’t work out was why and how we could change that for future generations.

But then maybe it’s an essential part of growing up? Having a body hang up and getting over it?

We discussed the influence of the media, peers, social media  and parents on our body image. The fun of lingerie (and how it’s for the woma’s benefit as generally the guy is just raring to get down to the nakedness beneath) and the joy of our vaginas.

I found that actually my body image now is pretty good. I’ve struggled with it for so long but now I’m really starting to love my curves. Why? Because I have the constant and unending love of my husband who never fails to tell me how beautiful I am for a start. I’ve found a bunch of people who are happy, confident, kinky and encouraging. It’s very freeing to be able to show off intimate bits of your body in front of a group of people and to feel comfortable doing so. I have to extend a Thank you  to all at Miss T’s and special thank you to Sensei for introducing me to this group. And at long last I’m listening to the lovers in my life, not the haters and believing in myself more. It’s very freeing.

It really was a great discussion and the night sped by. We got to check out a sample of a Scarlet Ladies circle too. That was really interesting. It was a great way to impart advice and help without getting in the person’s face. I enjoyed that experience very much. I think the circle is a great way to get help on intimate problems without getting embarrassed. Great idea, ladies.

Everyone had a grand old time and got to take a box of awesome goodies home with them too – even me!

I dashed back home to Manchester straight after, it was a long but fun day.

Body image is such a huge part of a healthy lifestyle, so how do you think we could all encourage positive body image in each other? One comment, picked at random will win a Blisseful bundle of body and mind pampering goodies. I will draw the winner on the 28th June.